2017-09-28 / Opinion

The Whole World May Be Messed But Broadway has the Street Fest

Let us lift up our glass, now that summer unwarms,
We survived the gray days of three tropical storms.

Winter’s projected to be fiercely cold. Bummer.
But almanacs predict a long Indian Summer!

In the waning daylight of dwindling September
We reflect on local news still fresh to remember

The Ocean State survived this year’s tepid third quarter,
With enough baggage to cripple an Acela Train porter;

From Black Ships to synagogue bells to church facades,
From political veterans upset by newcomers who beat the odds

From school hoops to Broadway stoops,
From calling names, to Halls of Fames, to playground games,

Here is the Gram, the post, the text, the Tweet, the buzz
For the quarter turn year that just was.

Newport and Middletown
Newport Fire Chief Peter Connerton hung up his helmet.
As the old English say, “Well done, hale fellow, well met!”

The Pell School playground took down its hoops.
Whoops!

Wait. Next day: Let’s revisit.
Next day: Is that hoop up again? Is it??

A new face became a new Senator, Euer.
Appropriately rhymes with her profession of lawyer.

The cause and culture of Rogers High School did a dance
When the district hired new principal Jared Vance.

The Newport Yachting Center did very, “Well, well, well…!”
Their plan passed the Planning Board for an 84-room hotel.

Police will watch this carefully; they will catch any wayward
stammerers;
The City Council allotted the dough to upgrade their surveillance
cameras.

Council generosity didn’t stop – they aided the children of city
commuters
$600,000 more to buy them 900 laptop computers.

RISD students got a grant to imagine the Point's rising sea levels;
In the old days, they just painted them, the enterprising little devils!

On an organic farm in Middletown, yoga is done with live goats.
Well, as a RISD student might say, “Whatever floats your rising boats!”

The Malkovich family said goodbye to the Newport Music Festival,
After four decades at the helm, they were the best of all.

The Opera House is getting closer and closer to awaited renovation.
If you close your eyes, you can almost hear the standing ovation.

A new musical came to Firehouse Theatre about online dating.
Is this our future? Shiver Me Timbr! Electronic mating?

A troupe did “Macbeth” ‘midst tourists and dogs in a lot.
Which gave whole new meaning to the line, “Out, out, damn Spot!”

Former Rogers High student Troy Ramey was a finalist on “The Voice.”
But the smooth baritone ultimately wasn’t the judges’ first choice.

With injustice in Charlottesville creating national racial tension,
Newport groups rallied against White Supremacy and law-order
convention.

To collect on city water bills, you almost need a warrant.
Water rates skyrocketed into a (fee-payer) raging torrent.

But, “Water, thou art life itself!” Agua puts us in the game…
Newport wants to house the National Sailing Hall of Fame!

Just so no one takes advantage (so that nothing looks too smarmery)
Mayor Harry Winthrop wants to put it in the Newport Antiques
Armory.

60 Antique Roadshow appraisers came to Rosecliff
Assessing the value of 7,000 items! “Those rock!” “Those whiff!”

Commuting to the city has been a bloody wreck.
As crews replace 1,197 feet of the Newport-Pell Bridge deck.

Broadway merchants with spit and polish and their inimitable flair,
Will pick up every cigarette butt in time for the annual Street Fair!

30 bands, comics, face painting, crafts, vendors, a smorgasbord
on the 7th,
There, there and everywhere.
From Equality Park to Washington Square.

Don’t miss it. We predict it will be exquisite.

Rhode Island
Gov. Raimondo's still pushing for free college tuition.
While House Speaker Nicholas Mattiello is on a no-car-tax mission.

Cell phone companies stuck antennae on every hill.
They would put them on birds, if they could get them to stay still.

The state has no new business; we’ve farmed out all our IT genius nerds.
How do we pay for all this? Cell tower fees on birds?

Love Sox. Miss Sox. Saw Sox.
Sigh! Nobody wants the PawSox.

There are so many more issues to which I could delve.
But writing this sonnet has exhausted me, myselv!

I will do this encore, news to remember, next time deep in December.
James Merolla

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